Who Was HE?

Monday the sports world lost big time.  One of the granddaddies of modern sports, and unspoiled for over a century, the 117th running of the Boston Marathon was brutally attacked.  And I am fairly certain when and if the perpetrator of this sick crime is found out, it will be a man.

As a man who works to improve the state and reputation of masculinity, that cuts even deeper than the pain of losing something so special (I have personally run the Boston Marathon 4 times, and my family would wait to cheer me not very many feet away from where the second bomb went off - See http://pastorbecca.wordpress.com/2013/04/16/from-heartbreak-hill-to-heartbreak/).  It is almost not even a question whether or not a man did it - it is just assumed.  We are the violent ones.

But we aren't just that! I often tell men that if they want to understand the fullness of masculinity they need look no further than between their legs.  Part of our apparatus is hard, and aggressive, and that part can be hurtful as well as the source of pleasure for our partners.  But the other part of our masculinity is soft and quite fragile (if you have ever gotten a kick in the nuts, you know how fragile they are).  That part of us must be protected.  That part of us is the source of our life-giving, life-creating gift.

We often, as men, say to each other, "Grab your balls, and do it!" as a way to communicate the sentiment of getting tough.  But I think we have it backwards.  We need to grab those puppies as a way to remember that we have a soft underbelly, that we are vulnerable to attack and that we (and our species) need to be protected.

Yea, a man probably did that - a man that had no balls! He had no sensitivity for others or for himself. He had no compassion for the human race and, in fact, assembled his weapon for maximum pain and carnage. I have a difficulty containing my rage for that man, but I know that violence only breeds more violence.  The only way to heal this is through love and compassion.

So, brothers, grab your balls, and squeeze tightly.  Remember how fragile you and your life are. Remember your capacity to create and sustain life. We have to show up bigger and stronger than he did.  It is the only way.