Sun Tzu and The Art of War (part 3)

You may wonder why we chose to write about the “art of war” in this a blog on relationship success. The simple truth is that men can relate to warring and battles. In addition, we need to recognize that for over 2,500 years Sun Tzu’s The Art of War has stood as one of the most circulated and universally used piece of “relationship” wisdom on the planet. This is the third in a series of postings based on Master Sun’s craft of engaging with others for successful resolution of conflicts.
Di. The concept of Di (pronounced as dee) has to do with your resources. What personal and physical resources do you have at your disposal? Think of these as the tools in your toolbox. Some of you may be supremely articulate and capable of running circles around your wife in any battle of wits. Some of you are skilled with your hands or in physicality. Remember that each of these can and will be at times either assets or liabilities. Sun Tzu always pointed out that our goal is to be aware of that and turn our liabilities into assets.
But by resources, Sun also was referring to location and the lay of the land; prime considerations in planning battles. Do you have arguments in your bedroom or bathroom? Where is the neutral location in your home so that your wife does not feel trapped when “attacked” by you? It is as important to consider her sense of the location as well. If your objective is to subdue the enemy, that is one thing but if your righteous objective is sustaining the relationship, then be aware of the “lay of the land” when you choose to engage with her. Sometimes a surprise (amorous) attack in the kitchen produces a surprising result, and sometimes suggesting the use of some “toy,” hours into a passionate love-making session can instantly deflate her desire. Like Tien (timing), our resources are essential tools for success when used judiciously and in the proper fashion.